A Little About Me

 

I go by the name Lazarus on this blog. I’m a guy past middle age who likes to write from time to time. I’m very happily married and have a grown daughter. I am the pastor of a Baptist church and I have been serving God there for more than three decades. I really enjoy traveling, although I don’t get to do so much of it lately. I am always interested in learning new things and I particularly enjoy science along with American and ancient history, whether dealing with actual events or the cultural details of the time. Don’t sign off now but…I really enjoy the game of baseball and I’m a lifelong and diehard Boston Red Sox fan. I mean diehard. Did I mention lifelong?         

                                    

I can be intensely serious, and I can also be a bit of a dork. Examples? I’m pretty much of an old-fashioned style of leather-lunged Baptist preacher who takes the love of God and the Gospel of grace very seriously, but I also think that Pinky and the Brain along with Get Fuzzy represent comedic genius. I’m a theologian who believes that many societal ills could be reversed if people would repent of their sinful state and trust in the atoning work of Jesus Christ, but I also celebrate the fact that I can tie a cherry stem into a knot with my tongue. Yeah, serious and dorky.

I was involved in a horrific traffic accident while riding my motorcycle back in late 2013. I was initially convinced that it was not a cathartic event in my life, but the truth is that it has changed a lot of things for me. Life is full of surprises.

I plan to maintain a level of anonymity on this blog because those who know me will recognize me here anyway, and my wife is concerned about stalkers regarding the rest of you 😉. Hey, if she’s happy, I’m happy. Consequently, if she wants privacy, I maintain a certain level of privacy. If you look up the name Lazarus you’ll understand my choice of a pseudonym better. It may all seem a bit odd in light of the fact that I’m sharing so much intimate information about myself throughout, but hey, it’s my blog.

                                    

100 Useless Facts About Me

1. I could eat the same food item every day for a week, and then not eat it again for the next ten years.
2. As a result, many people believe that I have favorite foods when I really don’t.
3. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are one of the most repulsive foods that I’ll never taste.
4. So are casseroles, along with egg, chicken, and potato salads. Did I mention sauerkraut, relish, and coleslaw?
5. I am fascinated by most of the things that I fear.
6. If I had to choose a method of death, my choice would be to jump from an airplane without a parachute and enjoy the ride down.
7. I would rather drive for twenty minutes than sit still in traffic for ten minutes, all to get to the same destination from the same origin. It’s all about motion and progress.
8. Solitude has never bothered me.
9. If life afforded irresponsible behavior, I would live near the beach and devote myself to learning how to surf really well all day, every day.
10. Ironically, I have never been surfing.
11. I find tattoos on women to be repulsive. (Think of spray painting graffiti on the Taj Mahal)
12. As a young kid, I thought that the lyrics to “Jingle Bells” included the words “in a one horse slope and sleigh”. Consequently, this part of the song never made sense to me.
13. I have little patience for people who do not listen well.
14. I am not a good listener.
15. It is my opinion that vanilla is the most underrated flavor on the earth.
16. I believe that government is equally necessary and evil.
17. My favorite color has always been purple, but I rarely use this in any way.
18. In the classic debate of Curly vs. Shemp: Curly.
19. I can remember that the first book that I ever checked out of a library as a kid was titled “The Coming of the Mormons”. I never did read it.
20. I believe that grapes are the perfect fruit.
21. I really love to laugh. A lot.
22. I believe that humor does not have to be conventional.
23. I love the feeling of a warm bed on a cold night.
24. I could stare at tropical fish as they swim in an aquarium tank for hours.
25. Babies fascinate me.
26. I believe that quiet is underrated.
27. A Christmas Carol is my favorite story. (Fault, opportunity, redemption)
28. I have made far too many mistakes in life.
29. I will never allow them to defeat hope.
30. I hate having even the smallest item in my pants’ pocket.
31. I like men’s jewelry and cologne, but I can’t stand wearing any of it.
32. I think that telephones are highly overrated.
33. Travelling to space would be a great thrill for me.
34. Staring at the Earth while standing on the moon would be a greater thrill.
35. I can let go of people in my life as quickly and easily as I embrace them.
36. I am probably smarter and more aware of my surroundings than I allow anyone to know.
37. If I could choose to possess one superpower, it would be the ability to control physical matter with my mind. (Mental Man??) And yeah, no cape.
38. I have always felt that God has guided my life since childhood for a specific purpose.
39. I have always been His greatest hindrance toward that purpose.
40. I love hats on women.
41. I would like to be able to play the violin, but I am too lazy to start taking lessons.
42. One of my thumbs is double-jointed.
43. I think that owning a classic Victorian house would be cool.
44. I could live without vegetables and experience no feeling of loss at all.
45. I watch cartoons often with great enjoyment.
46. I am more sentimental than most people think.
47. I could spend my life traveling to different places.
48. Between each trip, I could easily stay at home without the need to go out.
49. I have the need to feel that there is some sense of order in my life, even amidst the worst chaos.
50. I see great beauty in the stormiest weather.
51. I love sunny days.
52. I feel an obligation to eat beyond healthy standards when I pay for an all-you-can-eat buffet.
53. I would love to be a Major League pitcher for the Boston Red Sox.
54. I can recall fond memories from every era of my life.
55. I love tools of any kind, even if I have no use for them.
56. If I had a wad of money, I would find greater joy and satisfaction in handing it out to poor people on the streets than I would in shopping for things.
57. I think that trimming my nails is the most tedious part of personal hygiene.
58. I hate having overgrown nails.
59. I have always been interested in the study of historic ancient cultures.
60. Ancient Egypt is my favorite.
61. History, as a whole, is a great subject to study. So are paleontology and archaeology.
62. I rarely forget a face.
63. I often forget names.
64. When I was a kid, I was an official member of the Archie Club.
65. I can touch the tip of my nose with my tongue.
66. I cannot stand so-called political correctness as much as I cannot stand insensitive behavior. Life’s a balance, you know?
67. I believe that disappointment is a necessary evil if life is to be lived properly.
68. I have memories that reach back to when I was about two years old.
69. I often cannot remember things that happened just a few days back.
70. Spiders and roaches are the only insects that I find repulsive.
71. I am as easily intrigued as I am bored with life.
72. I didn’t remember dreams from about the age of fourteen until I was fifty years old.
73. I don’t have a need to fully understand my surroundings or circumstances. It is my preference to experience and enjoy rather than analyze.
74. I am not intimidated by the aging process. Life is just a constant series of adjustments.
75. I am inclined to trust people by nature.
76. I am rarely deterred by the fact that people consistently prove themselves to be untrustworthy.
77. I believe that ignorance, pride, and arrogance are a more dangerous combination than gasoline, matches, and a bored ten year old kid.
78. When I was very young, my eyes were so dark that people would stare at them to see if they were black.
79. I am constantly reading for the sake of knowledge, but I would prefer to learn by video and documentaries.
80. I believe that I am slightly ADD. I cannot process too much information at one time, but when I get it, I get it.
81. One regret that I have in life is that I learned to speak Spanish as a child before I spoke English, but now as an adult I can barely speak Spanish. Such a waste.
82. Four has always been my favorite number. I have no particular reason for this.
83. I really hate having flat feet. They hurt all the time.
84. Any time that a physicist talks, I listen.
85. If I had a time machine, I would ultimately decide to disable it unused. The benefits of accumulated experiences outweigh the ability to undo past miseries.
86. I love getting in shape physically, but I hate staying in shape physically.
87. Get Fuzzy is my favorite comic strip, and it is the only one that I bother to collect.
88. I really like using the term “surly weirdoes”.
89. I don’t particularly like man-hugs, high fives, or fist bumps.
90. I hate any form of contrived machismo.
91. I enjoy every season of a year’s cycle equally.
92. I believe that nature is the pallet upon which God has expressed His art.
93. I think that junk food should have its own tier on the Food Pyramid.
94. I hate being late to anything by even a minute.
95. I would rather die on my feet than live on my knees. Old saying, relative meaning.
96. I will keep a pair of jeans until they are technically a clump of threads.
97. I hate going to doctors. Before my accident I had to be half dead before considering a visit to any medical professional.
98. I love to purge and organize closets, drawers, rooms, refrigerators. etc…
99. As such, I am slightly OCD, with a bit of anal retention mixed in.
100. If I were filthy rich, I would keep a full-time masseuse on payroll.